Driven Insane
by Squibidyflop
Summary: Tsukune's trip to Yokai takes an unexpected turn...


Tsukune was nervous. Today was his first day at Yokai Academy, a school he really didn't know much about. His parents had gotten him enrolled very quickly, which Tsukune found strange considering the poor grades that had prevented him from going to any other schools. Still, he counted himself lucky. Now, all he needed was a friend.

As he boarded the bus, he started to sense something was a little... _off_. For starters, he was the only one on the bus. One person on a bus in Japan was strange; one child on a school bus was unheard of.

"Excuse me," he asked the driver. "Is this the bus to Yokai Academy?"

"Indeed it is boy. Now get comfortable, we have a long drive ahead of us." Tsukune tried to catch a glimpse of the man's face in the rear view mirror, but all he could see was two orbs of light surrounded by shadow. Now he was _really_ nervous.

The bus lurched to the side throwing Tsukune from his seat as his mind filled with the sounds of metal crunching and glass breaking. His head slammed against the side of a seat as he was showered in shattered glass, leaving dozens of tiny cuts on his face, and a few on his hands. He had never experienced this kind of pain in his entire life. The driver was calling to him, but the voice faded as Tsukune drifted into unconsciousness.

**/**

The sound of a girl screaming woke Tsukune form his slumber. Also gunfire. Okay, mostly the gunfire. He had a horrible headache, and all this noise wasn't helping at all. An American man was yelling somewhere in front of him. Tsukune didn't understand most of his words, but he knew enough English to recognise the obscenities.

As far as Tsukune could tell, he was in a car. This car was going very fast. People in other cars seemed to be shooting at this car.

Were they being kidnapped? The screaming girl was in the back with him, the American driving. There was someone next to the American, but he couldn't tell who it was.

Tsukune dared to open his eyes... and saw darkness. He brought his hands up to his face, and touched what he knew to be bandages. Using the expert deduction skills only teenagers possess, he speculated that whatever caused this could be connected to the cause of his headache. His brain also managed to decide for him that he required more information about his current situation.

"What in God's name is going on?" he screamed at no one in particular (maybe because he didn't know who was there).

"Quiet boy, we're busy." Tsukune recognised that voice... the bus driver! He sounded angry. He could tell the bus driver's window was open because he had to yell to be heard. The bus driver seemed to be firing a gun out of said window. Despite Tsukune's wish for the headache to go away, he reasoned that it would not be wise to agitate the two men any further.

Tsukune felt a hand on his back, and then another on his arm. A soft, feminine voice was telling him to put his head between his legs and stay calm. Wasn't this the same girl who had just been _screaming her head off? _Tsukune was about to point out that particular hypocrisy when a bullet tore through his left shoulder.

For a few precious moments, there was no pain.

After that, it was only pain.

"Dammit!" the American said. "He's gonna bleed all over the seat!"

Tsukune began flailing his arms about wildly as he screamed as loud as the girl was, as if the sheer force of his movement would stop the pain. His hand slammed into what felt like a large cross. He knew he had just technically hit a girl, but at the time he didn't really feel like apologising. He pulled hard on the cross, trying to get her to help him. The cross came free from the chain surprisingly quickly.

The change was immediate. Tsukune could feel the heat emanating from the seat next to him; he felt as if he was being blown away by its force. Suddenly, the heat was gone. All the gunfire stopped, as if their attackers were also wondering what was happening inside the car. He felt a cold hand take hold of his own, and a much calmer, more mature voice than before began to whisper in his ear.

"I don't know how you did that, human, but you have just saved all of our lives. We shall speak more of this later." Tsukune was entirely engrossed in the voice, almost completely forgetting about his injury.

"O-Okay," he managed to reply. He really just wanted to hear that soothing voice again.

Tsukune was suddenly being battered by wind from the girl's side of the car. Next, unbelieveably, he heard footsteps on the roof! It was obviously her, but _how? _He didn't know what was happening outside, or what the girl was doing, but he definitely recognised the sound of metal crunching he remembered from the bus crash. Then he heard it again. And once more after that.

"Ouch, sounds like she's doing to them what I almost did to you guys," the American said in mangled Japanese.

"Wait, you're the guy that hit the bus?" Tsukune yelled.

"Of course! Me and that little bird up there were already on the run from these bozos, and I asked her to drive while I shoot. So naturally, the first thing she does is crash into something."

The bus driver was too busy watching the girl take out their pursuers to even pay attention, let alone be angry.

As the girl climbed back into the car, Tsukune asked her what she had done.

"Just saved your life." Way to be smug about it, missy. She took the rosary from back from Tsukune's hand, and as she did so the pain of his injury returned. He felt the rush of heat again, and after it was gone the girl placed her hand on top of his. He blushed, and she must have been able to tell because she giggled.

They pulled over quickly once they were sure they weren't being followed, stopping at a nearby park. The American ordered everyone out so he could look at the 'damage' Tsukune's blood was doing to the leather seats.

Tsukune and the girl went to sit on the grass, the former having finally stopped screaming himself to death.

"Stay still for a second," she said to him. "I'm going to take off your bandages."

"Are you sure? Is that even safe?" What, was she going to clean his shoulder with the bandages from his face?

"Not normally, but I know a way to heal you much faster. Just hold still okay?"

Tsukune complied. He did stay still, until he suddenly felt the girl's weight pressing on his lap, and her... chest touching his own. He stayed completely silent and very still, but he had seen enough animes to know that he would be blamed for this.

"Oops, sorry about that," she giggled. "It's more comfortable this way. You don't mind, do you? I know they're not very big, but they still manage to get in the way." Luckily, Tsukune's bandages still covered his face. Otherwise, this very... _direct_ girl may have had a shirt full of nosebleed.

But when they did finally come off, he couldn't believe what he saw. A girl his age, in school uniform! And she's really cute! And her hair is bubblegum pink!

"Umm, are you okay? You're staring... and twitching."

Snapping out of his daydreaming, Tsukune began to apologise profusely. The girl just laughed it off. She probably got that all the time.

"Really, it's fine. What's your name?"

"I'm Aono Tsukune."

"Pleased to meet you, Aono Tsukune! I'm Akashiya Moka! Now, I really need to heal you before that wound gets infected, so please stay still." Moka was leaning in very close to Tsukune's neck, causing his nose to start bleeding again. "I don't know how much vampire blood I can give you with how much you've already lost. Oh well, better safe than sorry!"

"What? Vampire bl-"

_**CHOMP.**_

**/**

From the top of a nearby hill, Tanner and the bus driver looked down at the devastation before them. Fire as far as the eye can see, the sky filled with thick black smoke.

"So was today just a Japan type of thing? Or are the three of you just _extremely weird_?" The American was as confused as he was... no, no, just confused. His brain was so full trying to process what the hell happened that day that he didn't really have room for anything else. First, he's being chased by the Yakuza. Then, some pink-haired girl on a bike _lands on top of his car on said bike_ and _asks if she can help_. When she does try to be useful, she ends up steering the car straight into a bus! She even insists on help the people from the bus, in case the Yakuza kills them too! He didn't even want to try thinking about the part where she _turns into a vampire and destroys a bunch of cars by looking at them_.

"Honestly, I'd say both."

"You know what? That's pretty much the answer I expected. I think after this little adventure I'm heading back stateside. Doesn't feel right not having my gun with me all the time. Goodbye, nameless creepy dude."

"Farewell, Tanner. I shall seek out these 'video games' you claim to star in."

"Naw, you don't have to do that, buddy. They're actually pretty crap games." As Tanner got into his car and slowly dove away into the night, the bus driver realised he had been left to clean up the mess. Son of a-

Rumbling in the distance. They were coming back. The bus driver turned around to find the two teenagers racing back up the hill to where he was currently standing. Of course, this was racing at vampire speeds; the two had actually gone to Sapporo and back in about 10 minutes. Still, he quickly retreated into the distance as they finished at the top of the hill. For these were no longer teenagers. Both boy and girl were very clearly vampires, complete with white hair and red eyes. Of course, as a staff member of Yokai Academy he should be preventing them from revealing their true forms while in the human world, but after seeing what they had done to start all those fires, he wasn't about to get in their way. Strange, when that boy got on the bus he could have sworn he was human.

As the boy and girl shared a passionate kiss, silhouetted by the light of the moon, the bus driver had the courtesy to avert his gaze. Partly out of respect for the young lovers, and partly for not wanting to be held responsible for the earthquakes caused by the violent, earth-shattering sex that was about to begin.

"Yep, definitely have to tell the Chairman about those two."

* * *

><p>AN: This was only intended to be a one-shot, and I don't want to force out another chapter if I don't have a good idea for it. If I ever get an idea of where this story could go, I'll update.

Of course, if you guys have any ideas, I'd be happy to hear them.


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